Growing up in a small town
as a Jehovah’s Witness, my mother tried to keep me semi-sheltered from life
outside of what I was taught to believe.
My father just went along for the ride.
At the age of 18, after barely graduating high school (due to boredom),
I left the very next day, in 1988, in my parents tiny truck with a friends
brother in tow, and moved to Los Angeles from Oregon. I moved to the literal, on a map, this is it
Los Angeles. We started out as four in a
1-bedroom which turned into six, living in the “Spanish area” which had the
Korean police department about 3 blocks away.
It was quite a change from what I grew up with, but I was ready for
it. I wanted to go out and experience life. I assure you, I did. I got a job at a record store, part time, and
barely made enough to eat…but, I didn’t care, I was free. I lived and worked in a grimy area of the
city, but for the first time in my life I felt like I could breathe.
One of my friends and I
moved to another apartment in the south part of Downtown Los Angeles a couple
of months later – this time it was three in a studio, near the Los Angeles
River and the Jewelry District. I was in
Los Angeles for a total of six months.
The amount of things I experienced in this time was enough to write a
small book, and I’m grateful to this day for that. I wouldn’t change the being broke and not
getting enough to eat, missing out on a crazy rave (and what would have been my
first and only experience with heavy drugs) because my instincts took over,
meeting a man I adored only to find out he practiced Voodoo and wanted a wife
to compliment him, or the number of people I met that I’m still in touch with
to this day. I found myself in Los
Angeles. I woke up. I realized that I didn’t have to be what I
was molded to be. I realized I could be
who I was born to be, which was far from what I was “trained” to become.
I bought myself a ring in
the jewelry district about a month before moving back home to Portland. I wore it on my ring finger for years – a
solid gold wedding band. I married
myself in Los Angeles, and told myself this when I put it on. I gave into myself and found myself, and I
wouldn’t change that experience for the world…and I know I’m blessed because so
many others aren’t allowed to experience life once they turn “of age”.
